These last five months have been revelatory, sometimes in ways I would not have guessed or even particularly thought I wanted. But life is like that sometimes. 

I have read a lot on the topic of decluttering, downsizing, minimising—several books, lots of blog posts and some Instagram wisdom here and there too. The first thing I realised was I had to ‘get my mind right’. Remember ‘Cool Hand Luke’ with Paul Newman, 1967? The officer in charge of work details said to Luke, ‘You gotta get your mind right’, not in a loving, kind way—meaning he needed to drop his old attitude and realise he was in a new situation, mostly under the control of someone else. In the case of resizing our belongings I was in control of the attitude, but life circumstances, not so much. In the situation of our health outcomes we had to remain flexible to the recommendations of others. It has been a stressful time.

Do I love it? Is it useful? Can the item perform more than one task? Am I just keeping it because someone gave it to me? Does it have use for someone else? All good questions with varying answers. Fortunately I had the time needed to yield to the learning curve. To begin with I did easy things that gave high satisfaction. This kept me engaged. Cleaning out the junk drawer was one of the first projects. Working on things I wasn’t likely to be sentimental about or overwhelmed with quantity. To halve our belongings was my goal, but doing it one drawer or shelf or cupboard at a time was my strategy. As I approached the more difficult things I lowered my expectations. For a while I sorted through things only a few at a time and added them to a box, then moved the box to the holding area so it was out of the house. Sometimes I would only add two or three items a day. I learned from reading Atomic Habits, the best way to build a new habit or change an undesirable one is with tiny moves done regularly. They quickly amount to a noticeable difference. This enabled me to see some progress and have a sense of satisfaction to keep motivated. I hasten to add, there was a time near the end that it was a hard slog to keep motivated. My friend with whom I had the lawn sale was super helpful and got me over the line.

Gradually, during the process, I started to ‘see’ things for what they really were. Many things that were at one time useful and valued were no longer either. But I realised they had served a purpose and was very grateful to have had them in my life. Things I once thought were pretty or fun, or had sentimental attachment, just didn’t hold the same attraction when I was finally able to evaluate how they contributed to my life now. It was especially easy to let them go when I realised they were still of a condition that others could get use from them as well. I tend to look after things and keep them in good condition, clean and working, which makes them ideal to re-home.

• I sold my 40 year old sewing machine to a man who wanted to buy it as a surprise for his partner. He was very impressed what good condition it was in and later sent a message they ‘loved’ the machine.

• At least 50 pieces of silver cutlery went to a young woman who seemed like she had found buried treasure. She said she realised it is a ‘niche’ interest these days and so again, I was so happy for someone who would enjoy it to have it.

• A young woman probably in her late 20’s showed up at the lawn sale. She had moved to Alice recently and she was still trying to set up her rental quarters. She found a dozen things in the ‘free’ section, a few more in the 50 cent pile and when I saw her looking at clothes that I was pretty sure were her size and would suit a young person I offered her a space to try them on in the house. When she came out she was beaming, they all fit perfectly! One was a dressy top made of linen, a very nice piece that I knew I would never wear, having missed the occasion it was bought for, my 70th birthday. She told me she had a wedding to attend next month and a skirt it would look nice with. I reached over to a twice-used hand bag that went perfectly with the top and was just made for a young person and offered it to her as a gift. We were both very happy that she accepted!

• There was the young man who was keenly interested in cooking and seemed thrilled at the 50 cent cookbooks on offer. We started talking and eventually he took away my grandmother’s hand-cranked meat grinder, and several other vintage or antique items as well as some newer things that he told me were very well priced.

• Possibly the funniest of all sales came near the end…I had two flags that had been gifts to us years ago but we had never used them. One was an American flag and the other an Australian flag. I didn’t even list them in the sale merchandise, thinking no one would want them, but I did hang them for decoration in the background and the photo ended up on Facebook Buy Swap Sell. About halfway through the sale my girlfriend who had the sale with me, got an urgent message asking us if the American flag was still available? A woman wanted it very keenly but couldn’t get there for a couple of hours. So we folded it up and put it aside. Eventually when she called around a couple of hours later we learned she was Australian but worked in the Conservation area and they were putting on a skit for which they needed an American flag. She had NO idea where she would find one and was thrilled to see the one in our sale. But the funniest part happened when she was there and paid for it. There were two men from the Philippines here buying my husband’s chain saw, which in itself was weird because his name was the same as the friend Don had bought the chainsaw from! They were telling us they had worked hard and finally brought their families here from the Philippines. And then they saw the Australian flag and asked how much the woman had paid for the US flag and could they buy the Australian flag for the same price, $5? Sold. They were so excited to be taking that flag home to show their families.

Once the day was over we were exhausted but I felt lighter immediately and slept better than I had in weeks. A weight was lifted. But the lingering feeling of satisfaction I have from sending all those things into homes where they would likely be appreciated was the icing on the cake. It underscored one of my favourite lessons from this whole experience…things in boxes in cupboards or shoved to the backs of drawers that are never used are wasted resources. No matter who gave them to me or how much I paid for them if they are not used and I’m moving them around and cleaning them but never using or enjoying them, I’m still paying for them. But not any more. They are free to live another life and so am I.