I have mostly lived my life trying to learn lessons from everything that I do or that has happened to me. I have mostly found wisdom…sooner or later. A few weeks ago we were in Sydney and on our way to catch a tram, arms loaded with things for our daughter as well as an umbrella. Often when carrying an umbrella in Sydney the only effect is to scare away the rain. On this occasion we needed it. We were walking to the tram which would end only a 15 minute walk or so to our daughter’s apartment and this would give us some daily exercise.

It began raining and got wetter as we approached the tram stop–umbrellas opened. Worse, I was surprised that the ‘tap on’ spot to board was on a pole outside the tram, not inside as I have previously experienced in other cities. And our tram was sitting at the stop, about to close its doors! My right hand has developed some kind of dexterity problem for which I am having tests and seeing a neurologist, so trying to move the bag from my left hand into my right hand which was already holding the umbrella, so that I could reach my tram card in my left pocket, became a whole new level of challenging for me.

Not realising my difficulty, Don boarded the tram to find us a seat while I was still fumbling. Eventually I got ‘tapped on’ and boarded the tram and tried to fold up my umbrella which I hadn’t realised had become nearly impossible for my level of strength and dexterity. I dropped the bag and was getting everything wet with the partially closed umbrella while others behind me were trying to get around me to board. Suddenly a nice middle aged man travelling beside his wife jumped up and insisted I take his seat. Another person tried to help me finish closing the umbrella but didn’t understand the mechanism and I finally had hands free to do it. The nice woman next to me leaned over and said ‘It’s hard when it rains.’ Bless her for trying to make me feel better. What a nice couple.

The next moment a man appeared in front of me offering his seat so I could sit next to Don! There was no end to the kindness which nearly brought me to tears but for which I thanked everyone for and nervously laughed through my own predicament. In that moment I felt all of my nearly 72 years. I thought, and still think, in that moment I realised I’m older and different, but still the same somehow.

I say ‘older’ without remorse or regret, but more fully realising how others would see that incident and probably more in future. I’m not ashamed or embarrassed but I am aware I need to learn from it and prepare myself differently in future. That will probably include the purchase of a more user friendly umbrella.

The next day we travelled back to Alice. It was a busy Monday morning in security. A woman about my age was in front of me struggling with her carry on bag. She needed to lift it into a tray for x-ray and just as I bent down to help her, she got it. She turned to me and said ‘thank you’ and I said ‘sometimes these things are awkward’. She smiled a big, grateful smile and later when I saw her she smiled again. My lesson had come full circle.

(Note: I do strength, balance and dexterity exercises at least 5 times a week, and mostly am in good health but the hand problem began about a year ago and is at the moment undiagnosed. Tests are ongoing.)