After seventy years on this earth I still surprise myself at the things I learn. Yesterday was the last day of radiation treatment for Don, for this session at least. He comes home for a break and then we are off to Adelaide for more tests. And that is not to mention the tests we have both experienced during the four weeks he has been away. 

It was a slow build. The first couple of weeks had both of us doing things out of our realms of experience, his more so than mine, of course. He had to settle into a completely new routine of living in medical accommodation and daily treatments and how to best fill the hours in between. Having experienced it myself 12 years ago I know how thoroughly it challenges a person on every level.

By week three we were both somewhat adjusted to our ‘new normal’ but that’s not to say we either one liked it or weren’t feeling its effects. When the medical staff asked him how he was feeling and he admitted he was tired, they nodded sympathetically and said ‘radiation’. Yes, that, plus headaches for a person who has had few in his life, were tiring. And then there were the occasional night antics of his fellow residents staying in the medical accommodation. He was one of only two non-indigenous people staying there. Mostly they were polite and peaceful but it had its moments. (it was the same when I was there and speaks volumes for the poor health of our indigenous population)

 Meanwhile back at home base I was having a few moments of my own. I continued the odyssey that has been supervising and negotiating repairs from the severe storm we had in November of 2022. Yes. That was and IS still continuing. In fact so miserable has the process been and so poor the results, we have asked the Insurance company to settle the remainder in cash and we will finish things ourselves. Knowing this will fall to me was not a joyful conclusion, but such had been the pain of it dragging on and on for a year that we came to the conclusion the cost was way too high. With everything that happens in life it is worthwhile to evaluate the actual cost versus the monetary outlay.

Just when I thought this final week of our separation had climaxed with one intensive 24 hour period of trying to schedule both our medical tests in Adelaide, there was more. For Don to have his in Darwin meant spending more time there and a wait of a couple of weeks at least. For me to get my yearly mammogram here meant an indeterminate wait because the Mammographer only visits here every 3 or 4 weeks and it could be months before my referral came to the top of the pile. So we agreed if we could both get our tests in the same week, two weeks hence in Adelaide it would keep things on track for my yearly check up and for his continuing treatment. After a few phone calls I was finally connected to a lovely woman who could understand our situation and advised us how to proceed. She booked my appointment for 28 November. I passed along the information to Don who was able to follow up and she booked his appointment on 28 November too. The 28th of November is his 75th birthday, by the way. But such has been this year, we are both just grateful.

Having received news the week previous that the ‘pool guy’ the insurance company had enlisted to do our repairs, was no longer available to do the job—after waiting on him for months—we had agreed it was the last straw. The day after rescheduling our medical appointments we heard from insurance that they would get together the settlement costs and get back to us. We are still waiting. The wheels of progress run slowly in ‘insurance-land’.

The next evening we had major rain (for us) which collected in the top of the spa and collapsed the cover in. This only happened because the geniuses that had been sent by insurance to do repairs, cut the rope and cover while using it to cut the fence pieces for repair. I hadn’t noticed it until days after they left, they just quietly left and never mentioned it. After we had been so careful for a year to keep the spa covered so the grout didn’t dry out and so the water didn’t turn green, my heart along with the spa cover collapsed. I had no idea what to do. The new pool guy I’d found had not responded to previous messages and this was no exception. So he is not an option, not in any lifetime I have left here on earth at least. What a nong. So rude. A very nice neighbour who insisted I call them if I needed anything while Don was away, came to the rescue.

The worker he sent around took about an hour to resolve the issue and was one of the nicest humans I’ve ever met. When it was all done just by 2 in the afternoon, and I decided to treat myself and have the rest of the afternoon off. And as it turned out, on Saturday my boss gave me that day off too. With Don coming home the next day, my whole body needed time to reset. Just when I was congratulating myself, having gotten through it all fairly well, we had an intense downpour of rain within a few minutes that caused water to be driven in under the large expanse of windows that face the golf course and I found myself mopping last night, and trying to figure out who I will call to fix this latest problem. This only happened last night so I’ll let you know the outcome when/if it happens.

So what have I learned in my 70 years?

•. I’ve learned to go with the flow when it is obvious the flow has changed and I am not in it.

•. I’ve learned (quite a few years ago) not to chase repair people who don’t return messages. It’s a special skill they have to find the vulnerable customers who are desperate and will accept whatever level of work they decide to dole out.

•. I’ve learned that some years are crap. In that case I need to go with the flow a day at a time as much as possible… and take care of myself.

•. And I’ve learned when I am totally unmotivated and not able to create anything beautiful I need rest.

There is a tiny young bunny rabbit hopping around my garden at the moment. I think it is living in the undergrowth of our Grevillea bush. If that tiny bunny can be so adorable and survive the attempted decimation of the many previous generations of rabbits in Australia, then I can move forward with some grace.