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ardysez

~ surrender to yourself

ardysez

Tag Archives: reading

reading, listening, thinking…

19 Friday Jun 2020

Posted by Ardys in Books, Life

≈ 11 Comments

Tags

life, podcasts, reading, simplethings

I have been thinking. Hard. Listening better. Reading deeper. The world needs to change, and I do too. I’ve thought about change from various perspectives through the years. Every time I moved states or country I changed. I can’t recall an occasion when this wasn’t for the better.

I heard recently, being uncomfortable is necessary. Even some pain is necessary until we emerge renewed. The scars may remain, but they are reminders of how it/we used to be. We don’t like discomfort, let alone pain. Life is very hard a lot of the time, if we are doing it right. All the more reason we need to bathe in joy when we occasionally find it.

I’ve noticed when I’m going through troubling times there are a few things that stabilise me, even give me cause for hope. They are mostly small, simple things…walks…homemade food…learning something new…watching nature…being creative.

Tarta de Santiago made with my own two hands.

Looking at things more closely reminds me of the day I had just cleaned the bathroom and then needed to do something in there with my reading glasses on and suddenly I realised all the dust I had missed! Sometimes we don’t know what we don’t know and it’s good to take a closer look. I’m learning all kinds of things about converting basil cuttings with water roots, so that they will then grow in soil. I paid attention and five out of the five cuttings have survived. More importantly, I’m trying to learn as much as I can about the plight of People of Colour everywhere, especially in Australia and the USA. It’s the least I can do given my white privilege. The two things that are most important in our lives are the two things we have no control over…where we are born (what country) and who our parents are. I heard this many years ago and completely believe it, but am gaining a fuller understanding now.

Our local nurseries were out of seedlings and seeds for months. Since I had one healthy basil plant I decided to make cuttings and grew them in water. But you have to convert the water roots to soil, which takes about a week. All five cuttings survived.

Turning the questions around is a very important exercise too. I remember sitting at a table in a friend’s house 8 or 9 years ago, having a discussion with a third person about when she had colon cancer, the same year I’d had breast cancer. It was a stark wake up call to me, that not everyone reacts the same to things. She said her first thought was ‘Oh, why me?’ And literally, my first thought was ‘Why not me?’ I’m no better or worse than anyone else and people get cancer all the time, so why would I be exempt? We are not exempt from life’s trials and challenges, so we pull on our big girl panties and learn from it. All. There is always something to be learned.

Our local groceries have been out of coffee filters for weeks. There’s a tiny little sticker on the shelf where they should be that says ‘sorry customers, we are currently unable to get this product’. So this morning I tried making my coffee the old way, the way I used to make it before pour-over coffee became a thing. You know what? It tastes better! I may not go back to  filters. I could spend the money on something more fun than a piece of paper that gets thrown in the garbage, or I could even donate it to support something I believe in.

What’s my point? When you know better, you can do better. Thank you Maya Angelou, for putting it so clearly we can all understand. Have a great day each and every one of you, go out there and listen and learn and be kind. Let’s all do better.

What I’ve been listening to…

On Being – interview with Eula Biss (also this repeat interview with Isabel Wilkerson here – see mention below)

This American Life – Afrofuturism – sounds odd but I’m trying to expand my awareness.

What I have been reading and watching…

How to be an Antiracist – Ibram X. Kendi (also this TED talk on YouTube with Ibram here)

The Warmth of Other Suns – Isabel Wilkerson (also a previous post I wrote about this remarkable book is here, it will sound vaguely familiar…)

The Light of the World: A Memoir – Elizabeth Alexander (also a previous post I wrote in 2015 after I’d read the book, still one of my all time favourite books is here)

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book report for 2016

10 Saturday Dec 2016

Posted by Ardys in Books, photography

≈ 22 Comments

Tags

Big Magic, Books, Love Warrior, reading, Surrender Experiment

fullsizeoutput_293a

Naked Lady native lily

Hands up, all of you who ever had to write a book report in school. Yes, that would be most of us. I didn’t hate them, but I certainly could never foresee that I would be writing them voluntarily one day. As I mentioned in the previous post, I have a couple more books to share with you. I won’t say ‘recommend’, because I seldom do that with movies or books or music, given that we all have such varied tastes. I just like to make you aware of things and leave it to you to decide for yourself.

img_3337

Crepe Myrtle after the rain

Early this year I learned that Elizabeth Gilbert had written a new book called Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear . I really wasn’t sure what to expect. Her books have been quite varied, rather than all in one genre, the way many writers work. I recently heard her discuss this on a podcast, and it made great sense. She figures ‘I’ve done that‘ and so she doesn’t need to keep writing the same type of book repeatedly. In Big Magic, Elizabeth writes about the nature of creativity and in particular her own, which takes the form of writing. She expresses her experience in a way I had never previously considered. In particular she writes about a concept that I thought might be unique to her, but since reading it have also heard a very similar view expressed by conductor and composer, Alice Parker*. Elizabeth Gilbert feels the energy of an idea or project presents itself to a person who can express it on a level we humans can experience. But if you are not ready, or do not take up the expression of the idea, it will move on to someone else who will do it. It’s not nearly as magical as it sounds, and yet it is. The way she explains it seems perfectly plausible to me, but I am a believer that energy is everything. I’m not a writer per se, but I have followed a creative life since I can remember, and certainly ideas appear in my mind and if I don’t pursue them, I have seen them expressed by others. I’m sure there are other explanations for this phenomena but Elizabeth’s is expressed as clearly as something like creativity can be.

I found Big Magic very much to my liking, and I was sad when it finished. It is a book I will read again in the not too distant future, which I don’t often do.

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trapped droplet on grevillea leaf

I’m trepidatious about presenting this next book, because initially, it didn’t blow me away. It was much more of a slow burn.  It is very highly rated on Amazon, but a lot of things I don’t like are highly rated in many places. I found the book from a blog post that published a list of ‘books that you may not have heard of, but you should read’. I wish I had saved the post or knew where I’d read it because even Mr Google can no longer help me find it.

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Grevillea with droplets

The Surrender Experiment: my journey into Life’s perfection  by Michael Singer is one of my top books for this year because it changed my life. The funny thing is, I nearly put it aside after about a quarter of the way into it. It is an autobiography, and frankly, I’d never heard of the author. What hooked me was my curiosity to know what happened. I’m hopelessly interested in why people make certain decisions in life.

It’s easy to read, but very factual and maybe a little dry–sorry Michael. What makes it remarkable, though, is Michael’s life. He comes from an ordinary beginning, has no specific aspirations, but a great work ethic, if that makes any sense. It turns out Michael was very instrumental in the early development of computers and software, and you know what that means, he made a packet of money. None of that was what motivated him, however, and that was what interested me. The changes this book inspired for me, were twofold.

img_3413

after the rain

First, it inspired me to meditate again, but more importantly, to see it from a different perspective than ever before. It is not a book about meditation at all, though he is a lifelong meditator and it is integral to the story. Somehow, I saw in his story, the reason to meditate is for the practice itself. The quiet, the calm, the awareness of the moment. We have all heard about the benefits of meditation, but that is not why it is a valuable practice. It is valuable because through stilling our mind, we uncover our own wisdom.

The second concept Michael modelled is ‘to do what is in front of you’. That was his work. What is presented to us in the form of life events, is Life saying…’here, this is what will give you the experience you need right now‘. What valuable lessons to receive from a book.

In the previous post I told you about the third book I found most worthwhile from my year of reading, so I will only mention it briefly again, Love Warrior by Glennon Doyle Melton. Truly, I would find it hard to say which of these books was my very favourite. There were takeaway lessons for me from all of them. That is something I crave when I read. I want something to take with me, to carry me forward to the next part of life and the next book.

If you want to share your favourite book from 2016, or from any year, for that matter, leave the title in the comments below and I will compile a list of them and publish them in an upcoming post. Include a small review as well if you want to, or just the title is fine.

(photos were taken during this wet week in Alice)

*Alice Parker is a 91 year old choral director, composer and writer. A new podcast series which I recently started listening to called On Being with Krista Tippett introduced me to Alice. If you are a lover of choral music or interested in creative process this is a very interesting interview. Full disclosure; this podcast has an underlying spiritual theme and so does the interview.

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what I read in 2015

28 Monday Dec 2015

Posted by Ardys in Books

≈ 19 Comments

Tags

Books, reading

I’m poking my head up out of my summer hibernation to give you some holiday reading suggestions. About this time last year I posted ‘what I read in 2014’. It seems like a number of you are interested in what others read, as am I, so here is this year’s instalment. I continue to love that I can carry around an entire library in my iPad mini. Also, the ready accessibility of books for someone who lives in a place which no longer has a book store, and is far away from any place that does, is much appreciated. (Also, our town library is limited.) An ebook does not feel as satisfying as holding an actual book and turning the pages, and I find my eyes tire more quickly, but all in all, it allows me to read more and that makes me happy.

All of my reading this year has been non-fiction. That is my favourite broad category, but my tastes within it are diverse. Life is too short to read books you don’t like, so I started a couple of books and then put them aside as I was just not connecting with the material or writing style. That’s okay. Here are the ones I did finish, in the order I read them, and a comment or two about each one:

Small Victories by Anne Lamott – To start the year I had been saving this new book (hardcover) as a treat. It was enjoyable, but not as enjoyable as other books of hers, in my opinion. Bird by Bird and Stitches were more my cup of tea.

The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine N. Aron, Ph.D. – Listening to Elaine’s talks on YouTube and reading her book (paperback) helped me understand something I had previously only heard in passing. Some of us are highly sensitive beings, both in physical body and spirit. We are often made to feel abnormal with comments like ‘Toughen up’ or ‘Don’t be so sensitive’. The fact is we are sensitive to everything and it is not something we can help. Like most things it has its positive side, and we can manage the challenges very well.

The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying: A simple, effective way to banish clutter forever by Marie Kondo – It isn’t an exaggeration for me to say this book changed my life. It inspired me to have a huge cleanup and what’s more to look at ‘things’ and tidying in a whole different light. I highly recommend this book in its genre.

The Light of the World: A Memoir by Elizabeth Alexander – A simply gorgeously written, and evocative account, of her husband’s life and the trauma she and their sons faced upon his untimely death. Elizabeth is a poet and her writing has a poetic density to it. At one stage I felt as if I was grieving for my own husband, when he was away on a trip, and I had to stop reading the book until he was safely home again. I highly recommend this book.

Better Than Before: Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives by Gretchen Rubin – I have written in a little more detail about how this book helped me look at the decisions and habits revolved around my 365 Photo Challenge. I did not read it with particular thoughts of changing my habits, but more about understanding why certain things work for me and certain things don’t. Once one understands these things better, it is likely to change a person, and possibly it has, but I enjoyed the book nevertheless.

The Perfect Day Plan: Unlock the secrets of your body clock by Jost Sauer – Ok. This was kind of ‘assigned reading’…from my trainer. Ahem. I will elaborate on this adventure in a future blog post, but about four months ago I embarked on an exercise program with a trainer. It remains to be seen what the outcome will be. This book talks through the Chinese philosophy of chi and the body clock and how we can better work with our body clocks to achieve wellness. It was interesting, but I am not dedicating myself to this way of doing things, just keeping it in mind. I actually found that much of what it recommends, I had already gravitated to over the years, and the other ideas were not necessarily ones I found particularly useful.

Big Magic: Creative Living beyond Fear by Elizabeth Gilbert – This book was one that I enjoyed so much, I didn’t want it to end! I loved reading about Elizabeth’s journey through creative endeavours, and recognised many of my own experiences as well. Possibly my favourite book of the year. Loved it. I especially recommend this one for people who pursue the creative life.

Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead by Brené Brown – I kept seeing the author’s name popping up in the media and thought I would investigate her ideas. I first watched a Ted Talk that she gave and enjoyed it. Then I bought the book and started reading. I got a little bogged down about halfway through so I went back and watched her second Ted Talk and that reinvigorated my interest to finish it. I can see why her ideas are hitting a note with people and I liked them, though I did find it hard to maintain interest in the detail. Glad I read it, and Her Ted Talks are very good and funny.

The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion – This was a book I had been meaning to read for years. It is the memoir of her husband’s death and her subsequent grief and mourning the year that followed. It’s hard to say one ‘enjoys’ reading about another person’s pain but it certainly gives context to a lot of behaviours and thoughts we have around the subject of death, grief and mourning. I’m very glad I read it, and if you aren’t bothered too much by this sort of thing, I recommend it. Again, as with Light of the World, I had to put it down for a few days and regain my composure before finishing.

Man’s Search For Meaning: The classic tribute to hope from the Holocaust by Victor E. Frankl – This would have been a bit much to read immediately following Didion’s book, however, I did start another book in between the two, which I stopped reading and have now gone back to finish—a book called, The Wife Drought, which will probably be first on my list to finish for 2016, so I’ll tell you about it next year! Meanwhile, Dr. Frankl’s book is a harrowing account of his own and others’ survival of the Holocaust during the first 60% of the book. The last part of the book is his summary of a type of Psychotherapy which he pioneered, called ‘logotherapy’. It is based on helping people find the purpose of their life, which he asserts gives them hope and meaning enough to carry them through the most difficult of times. He died in 1997. I’m very glad I have read this, though, again, not an easy emotional journey at times.

my friend's family book

my friend’s family book

A Gentle and Hard Working Family Man – My final book to finish in 2015, is not one that is commercially available. It was written by a friend of mine. It is the story of her Grandfather who came from Italy to Australia, through his life and eyes. She had foresight enough to interview him over 20 years ago and record many details of life as it was, early last century in both Italy and Australia. The detail in the account made for very interesting reading. My own Grandfather migrated from Italy to the USA in about the same era, so it was particularly interesting to me. She also included lovely old photos. She and her husband put the book together and had it printed and bound as a gift to her family. Isn’t that a nice thing to do?

And speaking of gifts…

I will close with a photo of one of my favourite new things, a gift from a good friend. I mean, how can you not start the morning well when drinking coffee or tea and seeing this? Sending you love for the New Year.

give love, live simply, dream big be grateful, laugh lots. Yes.

give love, live simply, dream big, be grateful, laugh lots. Yes.

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what I read in 2014

31 Wednesday Dec 2014

Posted by Ardys in Books

≈ 20 Comments

Tags

Books, Food, health, reading

When visiting with a friend recently, I realised during our conversation I was mentioning quite a few books I had read. It started me thinking about how much what I read effects my life, so I’ve done a quick flick back through this year of reading. I’m not a fast reader, and alas, neither do I have high retention, but I enjoy reading and persevere, regardless.

The advent of e-readers has been a boon to my reading. Books are now cheaper, and for me, living where I do, more readily accessible. Also, there is not the problem of what to do with the physical book after I’ve read it. Do I keep it, or do I move it along?? That is not to say that holding the e-reader and turning virtual pages has quite the satisfaction of a real book, but to me, it is a trade-off I’m willing to make with most books (not all). I have noticed that the iPad mini (gift to myself) is much easier (than the old iPad) to hold, and enhances my reading process.

But I digress.

Here’s the list from this year, though I’m not sure they sound very interesting. I’m mostly a reader of non-fiction. I’ve listed the books in the order I read them, starting in January up until now. This is not necessarily the order in which I enjoyed them!

Almond Cake from Elana Amsterdam book

Almond Cake from Elana Amsterdam book

The Gluten Free Almond Flour Cookbook by Elana Amsterdam. As some of you know I can’t eat wheat or any grains very well, so this was a help for some all-important comfort food. I also subscribe to her blog.

Protein, veggies, and whole food fats is the way to go!

Protein, veggies, and whole food fats is the way to go!

The Calorie Myth by Jonathan Bailor. It helped me understand the science of how our body uses food, and it reinterprets old research, as well as reveals new research with regard to healthy foods and eating styles. I do not advocate slavish dedication to ‘diets’, I just found this book gave me a new understanding of how my body uses food. I have been using most of its guidelines for nearly a year now, since January, and can honestly say I have not felt as well for many years.

 

 

In the same spirit of inquiry I read:

Vitamin K2 and the Calcium Paradox by Kate Rheaume-Bleue, BSc, N.D. – pretty informative but not light reading, found it after hearing Kate in a radio interview, not recommended except for those health geeks among us, or those with calcium absorption issues.

The Wahls Protocol by Terry Wahls, M.D. This is a book about Paleo principals and functional medicine and how she cured her own MS. I also found this through a radio interview. Kind of interesting, probably more so if you have been diagnosed with MS, which, thankfully, I have not.

Magnesium Trace Mineral (am sure this was some 6th grader’s science project—awful book)

Magnificent Magnesium by Dennis Goodman MD. It sounds awful and corny, but was actually pretty informative, proving once again you cannot judge a book by its cover. Magnesium is a really wonderful mineral for our bodies. Since starting to take supplements in May of this year, I’ve seen improvement, if not elimination, of leg cramps and heart palpitations. It has also been good as Mother Nature’s little helper to ‘move things along’, if you know what I mean. Dr Goodman is a heart specialist, and much of the first part of the book focuses on the function of the cardiopulmonary system, but it does go on to include the multitude of benefits the right amounts of magnesium can bring to our bodies. The ‘right’ amount is key here, and, much to my surprise, was more than I am able to consume in my day to day diet. Any mineral that is contained in chocolate can’t be all bad.

Stitches by Anne Lamott. Loved this book and highly recommend it, short and entertaining as well as thought provoking.

The Book Thief by Markus Zusak. The one piece of fiction that sneaked into my list this year! You would have to be sleeping under a rock to have not heard of this one. Loved the book, thought the movie was average.

Your Personal Paleo Diet, by Chris Kresser. I read this to educate myself on this new trend in eating. Some very useful information, much of which was in The Calorie Myth, but enough of a different interpretation of the information to make it worthwhile. He also has a very good website and I like his relaxed approach to the Paleo lifestyle. A key thing I learned was to soak pulses before cooking and eating them. Has saved my digestion no end of distress!

Next came my melancholic phase of dealing with my Dad’s passing 18 months previously…

Can’t We Talk About Something More Pleasant? by Roz Chast. I’d read a review of this book and thought it might be interesting. It is written in a very unusual format, that of a comic strip. The content somewhat reflected my own experience, and was a bit of confirmation, but I found the format somewhat distracting, and I’m not sure I can recommend it.

Dad and Me, circa 1997

Dad and Me, circa 1997

The Long Goodbye, a memoir by Meghan O’Rourke. This was my breakthrough book in the mourning of my Father. She writes of the loss of her Mother with such raw intimacy I found it extremely helpful. I cried more than once while reading it, but it was very productive for me.

Being Mortal by Atul Gawande. This should be on everyone’s ‘must read’ list. And the reason we should all read it is so we can have the discussions about dying and illness and infirmity before it happens to us or someone we love. The first part of the book does not paint a pretty picture, I nearly put it down, following so close on the heals of starting to recover from Dad’s passing. But then it got interesting. He describes many case studies and scenarios both from a medical point of view, and from that of a son with aging parents. Very worthwhile, if not easy to get through, at times.

And now I’m back to regaining some balance in life…

Eat to Cheat Ageing by Ngaire Hobbins. Excellent, practical book for over 60’s, but also for younger people who plan to get old! Hobbins is an Australian dietician and writes from her experience of working with older adults and their difficulties with maintaining healthy weight and eating patterns. You may be surprised at how important it is to maintain your muscle mass, and even a few extra pounds, in later life. This should also be required reading for us all.

Thrive by Arianna Huffington. I’m actually cheating just a little bit here, I still have just a few pages left in this book, but I’ve read most of it and thoroughly enjoyed it. I started it because I wanted to know if I should recommend it to our daughter when she had a bad patch a couple of months ago. Her life seemed a bit unbalanced and took a physical toll on her. What I found was a book that I could relate to! You may know Arianna Huffington as the editor/founder of the Huffington Post. I thought she would write something for the high powered, achievement-oriented, career woman. However, she writes with great dexterity about how to live well in all areas of our lives. I especially love the quotations she uses often throughout the book. I am not familiar with her other books but I think I may go have a look… as soon as I finish the next two books awaiting me on my iPad!

Liquidz cafe, 'famous' bananas, appear on their Facebook page!

Liquidz cafe, ‘famous’ bananas, appear on their Facebook page!

Happy 2015 to you all.

xx Ardys

 

 

 

 

 

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